Its that Sunday of the month where holy communion happens to be offered in your church....your mama will not stop knocking at your door asking you to wake up, shower and head to church....you tell her you are too tired but she will not listen.after all you have missed the past Sundays after the last holy communion..
if only she knew what happened yesterday...that major hangover you are trying to nurse since yesterday you were out partying the whole night..anyway not ready to disappoint your mum you wake up and get dressed for church....she plays that song by Rose Muhando 'hicho kiatu kivue'...and all that is ringing in your head is the tune of some riddim you were dancing to last night obviously not gospel..and i can bet that bendova dancing style was involved..
you finally get to church and the worship goes on and on and finally its the pastors chance to pray for the holy communion...he preaches on and on about how you should be pure in heart before partaking the Lords table and damn girl if yesterday was anything to go by there is nothing close to purity in you...by now the glasses of wine are now at the pew where your sitting and you see every eye staring at you...imaginary of course...the last time you did not take the holy communion your mum asked aloud 'kwani umebackslide' swahili for have you backsliden...not ready for any questions you pick your piece of bread and cup of wine and proceed according to the pastors call...
That wasn't so bad you think to yourself as the sermon of the day starts..but holy communion moment was just the icing on the cake.the message of the day is directly to those who are addicted to clubbing, alcohol and other drugs, and to the prostitutes on koinange street...one among them are one of your sins...the pastor goes on to say that amongst the crowd in church there are characters struggling with one or more of those addictions...your palms become sweaty and you slide more to the edge of the pew as you constantly stare at the exit..the pastor points in the direction where you are sitting and makes an altar call...the spirit of the Lord directed him there and he says among the people sitting there are one of those he was praying for...he calls them to repentance continuously saying the Lord will set you free..he even mentions some of the clubs you usually visit and by now your hands are practically shaking...the pastor commands everyone to close their eyes and join together in spirit to pray for those people...you don't do so...because you know after all they are praying for you.....and then you hear the pastor clapping someone is heading to the front to give her life to the Lord...relief for a moment people are now opening their eyes...its not too long before you realize its your best friend Jos your partner in crime....the shock on your eyes...that sharp look your mum is giving you...she knows you were with Jos yesterday night...and Jos is right there at the altar confessing all your crimes....She says she has been soliciting money from sugar daddies, addicted to alcohol,oh yes and a shocker for church members cannabis sativa( inside joke).it now dawns on you mum...that common saying ' birds of a feather flock together'.did she just stare at that designer heel your rocking...evil laugh...she faints....oh yeah the life of a common believer........to be continued......
